The wind whips through my jacket, cooling me despite the steep incline to the top of Arthur’s Seat. I brace myself against the gusts and pump my legs harder, pushing until my breath is heavy. The sun shines brightly despite the strong southern wind. When I make it to the top I am surrounded by Scottish beauty. The people below are like ants crawling along the surface of a rustic doll house. My underclothes are damp in sweat and I am at peace for the first time in days. I find a rock to sit on and reflect my current state of reality. Two black crows catch the gusts above me, arching over the steep cliff before veering right.

Like them, I feel freedom in the wind.

The panoramic views of Arthur’s Seat are stunning. They sweep over Edinburgh, through the hills, over to the silver sea. Sunlight pierces through the haze to illuminate the lush green carpeting everything. This country is captivating me. It’s extracting anxiety and heartache from my soul, leaving complete and utter peace.

I wish I could sit for longer but the wind begins to freeze my hands and toes. I need to keep moving, keep pushing forward. Continue to warm the soul. I start my descent but the beauty beacons me, entrances me, hypnotizes me. Half way down I have to stop. I sit in the cold grass and inhale my surroundings with awe and wonder. These are the moments I’ve been searching for, been yearning for. My spirit is healing.

The other side of fear is peace.